Today was a good day. I finished up the latest chapter, bringing today's count up to 1052 words and making the week's total nearly 5K, fairly evenly split between my WIP and various fanfic projects. Not brilliant, maybe, but better than I've been doing. And better than I'll do this week, since we're going away again.

I declare it a good week's work.

This is a brief excerpt from somewhere near the beginning of my current WIP. I've only looked back over it once to check for grammar and spelling, so it will no doubt go through various forms before I'm happy with it. I don't think it really needs much introduction, so I'll just plunge in.

~~~

Liulfra threw the carcass aside and trotted further on through the woods, ears alert and nostrils flared. Her hunger and bloodlust were sated for now; it was time to seek out a new companion. She paused and sat back on her haunches, wondering what direction would be best.

She had very little knowledge of this area; until now, she had never travelled more than a day's travel away from the camp. She had been moving in this direction for three nights, sleeping during the day, relishing the opportunity to indulge her wolfish side. She still felt it strange that in a place where shapeshifters were the only inhabitants it was considered rude to wear a non-human shape in public, and she loved the feeling of release from such constraints.

It was so strange to be free of them. She had known nothing else all her life, and she found it difficult not to keep referring back to the camp in her mind; her journey had taken her only through forest so far, and she had not yet met a single human. She had, however, come across a pack of wolves, who had viewed her suspiciously at first but nonetheless welcomed her fairly swiftly into their midst. They had allowed her to spend the previous day in their den with them, although she was asked to stay in the main cavern rather than enter their own sleeping quarters. Wolves, as she had discovered before, were rather keen on their customs and stood firmly on tradition; only family members were permitted to pass the main halls of their homes. There had been a younger wolf, just ready to find a mate, who had viewed her with interest. It had been rather difficult not to respond, but she knew that if she did they would expect her to stay, and if she then proceeded on she would find other packs less welcoming in future. So she had rebuffed his cautious advances; but ultimately it only served to heighten her need for another companion.

It was now late the next evening, and Liulfra was beginning to feel a need for her human form. Although she was capable of remaining a wolf for much longer - indefinitely really - she preferred not to; too long and she began to wish to stay that way, almost forgetting that it was not her true shape. She glanced up at the night sky. The moon was high above the trees - a slim silver crescent. It would be new moon in just a couple of days, and she hoped she would be able to make the change sooner rather than later; although she was capable of doing so at any time, it would drain her strength more to do so at new moon that at any other time. During the week of the full moon she would be at her strongest, but she did not want to wait that long.

Shaking her fur, she stood again and continued along the slightly worn route she had chosen to follow, assuming that the chances of coming across human habitation would be higher on a route that seemed not exclusively for the use of animals. She moved quickly and quietly, relying mainly on her senses of smell and hearing. She stopped suddenly, raised her head and listened intently.

Voices. Human voices.

She had to stop herself from giving a yelp of excitement; instead, she moved quickly but cautiously in the direction of the noise, her paws treading softly on the worn ground, barely making a sound. As she spotted the group ahead, she moved off the path and dropped to her belly, moving soundlessly behind the cover of the shrubs that shrouded it.

Liulfra was very much aware that she had never actually seen a group of normal humans, but even so she was fairly certain that this particular selection was far from ordinary. In fact, they weren't even all human; the group seemed to include a surprisingly small lilac-coloured dragon, only a little taller than she was herself in wolf form, and perhaps twice as long. It would still be a challenge to fight - she licked her lips at the thought - but nothing like she had imagined a dragon to be. And she'd read enough books to know that they were supposed to be a bit more formidable than this one was, purple or not.

There were two women with the dragon - one probably a little bit younger than Liulfra, one rather older, perhaps around thirty-five - who she dismissed immediately, although she was interested to note that one of them seemed to be riding a flying horse; but there was also a young man. Probably about thirty. Rather pretty; not usually to her taste at all, but perhaps he'd be worth it. There were small lanterns on the backs of the horses - she wasn't sure how they worked, but they certainly didn't look like flame. She shrugged off her curiosity, and began to focus her mind to begin the change, but instead found herself listening to the group's discussion.

~~~

I have had a very 'meh' sort of day today. Firstly, we've been in between projects work-wise for the last couple of days, meaning that there wasn't anything specific to work on. Always a few stupid jobs to do of course, but they tend not to help when I'm feeling 'meh'. (Incidentally, 'meh' is a very useful word. I take it to mean listless, uncaring and altogether rather pathetic, but I suppose it's open to interpretation.)

When I have a day like this, I tend to try and do other things. Play silly games, look at some funny pictures and so on, do some re-reading on writing stuff in the hope that inspiration will hit me. Anything but actual work, much to hubby's disgust. Anyway. I re-read the last chapter of my NaNo and managed to scrape a couple of paragraphs together, then got pointedly called back to work. Didn't do much though. Spent most of today playing ChainFactor and repeatedly checking my email to see if my fanfic beta had got back to me. (She hasn't, but that's okay. I did after all take approximately two and a half weeks longer to send it through than I told her I would.)

I did manage to get a bit more done this evening though, which means that for the first time since mid-December I put in some decent time on my NaNo. Well, I say decent. 827 words to be precise. It's hardly what you'd call a lot, but it's better than it was. And now I've written a bit more, carrying on isn't quite so daunting. When you stop for a while - even just a couple of weeks - the momentum dies rather rapidly. With other things it's sometimes taken me months, even years to carry on once I've taken a break from writing something. So actually, this is a good thing.

It's also good (I think) that we now have a project to actually work on. It gives me some sort of focus. Unfortunately it's a rather broad and general kind of project, since the actual specifications are impossible and the idea is for us to just put together something that does the job. It's not fun, to be honest, but hey. Hopefully I can manage to get some hours in on it. At least it's something to do.

This week has been really slow for my NaNo. It's not that I haven't been writing - I've written two short present fics of about 900 words each, and last night I got hit by a sudden burst of inspiration for the multi-chaptered fic I was working on a couple of months ago and wrote about 1K on that. My NaNo total being around 500 for the week, I've managed between 2 and 2.5K, so I guess it's not too awful. The thing I'm actually proud of though is that tonight I went through everything I've done so far and wrote an outline for everything which still needs to be resolved. I don't know exactly how it's all going to happen, but knowing what I have to deal with is comforting.

I'm going back to the timer tomorrow though. Even if I just sit and stare at the screen.

I was away for this weekend, so didn't manage to write anything on my NaNo. I finally managed to get a few words down this morning, but it was only 340 - I spent most of the day developing a new website instead and the story just wasn't grabbing me. It will, I'm sure, but I'm on one of those scenes that starts out great then drags itself out til you're not sure where it's going or how on earth you're going to bring it to a close. Tomorrow's aim is not a number of words, but simply to close that scene. Stupid uncooperative MMC.

I did get some other writing done though. As a Christmas gift to some of my online friends, I've offered to write them fandom-related drabbles. Well, I say drabbles, but they're hitting about 800 words each at the moment. I wrote one by hand over the weekend, so today I typed it up and finished it off. I also started on the second and am now 600 words in. So if nothing else I'm keeping the creative juices flowing, which is good. Don't know what I'm going to do over Christmas - will be away for another ten days or so. Guess I'll just have to do my best to grab a PC when I can.

Having spent the previous evening talking long into the night with my DH about nothing in particular, I didn't get up early yesterday morning, and guess what? I wrote nothing. Not a single word made it into the document.

This morning my alarm made me literally jump (quite a feat when you're lying on your back in bed - asleep, I might add) and I snuggled back down to recover. Woke up an hour later and finally dragged myself out of bed. Unfortunately I was rather preoccupied, thinking that the express Amazon order I made yesterday wasn't going to arrive, so I made the mistake of switching on the router and checking Amazon, which was quickly followed by LJ, Facebook and various forums, not to mention all the blogs I've been keeping an eye on. So nearly an hour later, I still haven't written anything productive.

For the first time in a while, I'm actually not completely sure what's going to happen next in the story, and that's not helping, but I'm mid-scene - even if I can't picture the next one, I do know this bit, so I have no excuse. Well, I will for the next few days, since we're going to stay with my parents til Monday, so although the document will be making it onto my USB drive I don't think I'll be writing anything. Oh, how I long for a laptop. They're just so expensive though, and we *really* can't afford it right now. Particularly now that the big website we were due to do has pretty much fallen through - I wish people would explain things properly in their briefs. On the plus side, though, I guess that'll mean more time to write. I did apply for an online research job on Monday, which would be great - it's one of those things you can literally do when you feel like it. Haven't heard back yet, have no idea when I will.

So. I'm going to try and write now. Wish me luck. 

It worked.

I got up at 8:15 (the earliest I've seen in a few weeks), put the laundry on, got myself a cup of tea and settled down at the computer. I only actually wrote about 2000 words total today, but that was pretty good compared to my recent record, especially considering that I also copied the whole 55K over into yWriter and split it up into chapters and scenes, putting in all the characters and viewpoints so that by the time I finished I had a reasonable summary sheet. I love it - I actually know what's happened! Just going back and scanning to get scene descriptions was so useful - I realised I'd forgotten several key points. They weren't things that necessarily mean changing what I've got so far, but things that I really ought to remember from now on.

I also wrote the first antagonist PoV scene - rather late, definitely going to need to put something in earlier in the story, but it was good for a change of pace. Had brunch, washed up, wrote a bit more, played around with my character designs. I even washed everything up after dinner, so for the first time in ages the kitchen sides were entirely clear.

I also finally got round to rewriting some fanfic stuff for a friend this evening, which was a nice change; it's quite refreshing to let my mind rest in ready-to-go characters occasionally! Also since it was introspective stuff based on canon it meant that I didn't have to worry about the plot either, which is nice - means that I can just concentrate on the actual writing.

All in all, a good day. I'm definitely aiming to get up early again tomorrow - it really does just give me that extra time to write.

I went through a period a while ago where I had routines for everything. I'd get up at a reasonable time, shower, clean the bathroom, turn the PC on, put the laundry on, have breakfast, start work (or play, but the principle was the same). I'd wash up straight after the evening meal so that the kitchen was always in a reasonable state and I'd usually cook from scratch. I even hoovered the house regularly. Then I lost it. And that's too easy to do.

Anyway. I need that back now. Today I didn't get up til midday (woke at 11, having gone to bed around 2, then read for an hour), went shopping in the middle of Saturday afternoon (bad idea), did a couple of bits of website stuff here and there but not much, and didn't do any writing til 10pm. That's where I'm going wrong. I need to get up in the morning and write. I tried the timer today - managed 417 words in 15 minutes. Not my greatest record, but still, it was 10pm. And I don't do working late - I get silly.

I need to kick myself into gear. If I can be at the computer before hubby is at his, then I should be using that time for writing, not waiting til he's gone to watch TV at night. So I guess that's tomorrow's aim - get up, don't stay in bed reading, and instead of playing around on forums that I don't even post in, get writing. It's not like I don't enjoy it when I do.

So after the sheer oddity of the weirdness that was NaNoWriMo and the start of the longest bit of writing I've ever managed, I'm trudging a bit. I'm not particularly worried - I had a whole week during November where I didn't write a word, and although it wasn't ideal I still got 50K done before midnight struck at the end of the month. But it's a bit sad to look back at my November spreadsheet and see that on the days I was writing, I was averaging between 2 and 5K per day. Since I hit that 50K my biggest daily word count has been 725. Today was 703.

Still, the story's there. I had a couple of days where the next scene just wouldn't come - not because I didn't know what would happen, but because the new characters refused to make themselves known to me. So I sat it out, read a bit, wrote a scene from elsewhere, tried some collaging, and eventually went over to http://elouai.com/doll-makers/new-dollmaker.php and spent ages going through that trying to picture one of them. Eventually she fell into place, and the shop dummies that were standing in place of my characters reluctantly gave up their seats. It's still not quite right, but I've got through that bit and it's a start.

I know part of the reason I'm not writing as much now is that I'm not setting goals. During NaNo I stuck with a timer, 15 minutes at a time for the most part, and it worked. I wrote. For some reason I'm reluctant to continue that, but it means that my writing's been a bit here and a bit there, a couple of lines at a time, which isn't really that great for focus. Of course it doesn't help that I've been feeling rubbishy, but still, I've been sat at the computer, and there's no real reason for me not to write, so it feels odd not to be throwing myself into it. I want to finish this story; there's still so much to tell, but at the moment I'm just having to put one foot in front of the other. I guess I'm just working with what I can see in the headlights.

I'm actually looking forward to editing this, which is a first. Because I've written it with basically no outline, making very few notes along the way, I'm itching to get back to the beginning and just sort it out. I don't want to do that until I reach the end though - I need to carry on the momentum without looking back for the most part. Streamlining, editing, that's supposed to come later.

I think tomorrow I might try the timer again. I won't force it; I've heard enough warnings about how writing when you're not feeling it really isn't worth it. But if I can write for 15 minutes, I can hit 500 words. If I do it twice, that's 1K I didn't have before. That's nothing. Half an hour in the day. Even if I am feeling under the weather. Dainara would have no sympathy for me.